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Poetry Forum Index -> Humorous Poetry

MY BRAZILIAN WAXING
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 LifeVita6
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Mdm Prez



Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1536
Location: U.S. of A. 		MY BRAZILIAN WAXING

 I'm in Brazil for business
Rio de Janeiro to be exact
Can't think of a better place
To get a Brazilian wax

I get them home in Pennsylvania
It hurts a little sometime
When I get on my hands and knees
I feel like the local swine

So I found this place in Rio
Recommended highly, you see
Said to be the best waxers
My interpreter came with me

The salon was all marble
Whatever you wanted to drink
Everyone was very tan
And I am quite pink

They asked me what I'd like
A full or partial wax,
A landing strip or 'The Special'
Price included tax

My colleague who was with me
Said she couldn't do it
Would meet me at the hotel
Didn't want to just sit

'Okay, okay' I said to her
'You're gonna be really sorry'
She said 'watch that waxer over there,
With her I'd surely worry'

That waxer had huge biceps
Seemed rather rough and tough
Hoped I'd get another person
To see me in the buff

Sure enough, it was her I got
Came out, called my name so gruff
I saw her teeth were missing
She was in a bit of a huff

Took me back to her 'cell'
That's what she called the room
Handed me a robe
Said she'd be back soon

Started to undress, a little shakey
She walked in, said 'hop up here'
I said, 'hand me my robe'
She replied, 'have no fear'

It was at that very moment
The waxing didn't matter
Get my hairy ass out of there
Fell off the table with a clatter

Told her I changed my mind
Really had to run
Paid her in full anyway
Didn't want to get 'it' done

She took the money quickly
Looked puzzled at me
Flashed me that toothless grin
I flew out of there like a bee

I realized in the cab
I left my panties there
Didn't want to go back
I have more than one pair

So my authentic Brazilian waxing
Never really took place
In Brazil the home of it all
I won't again show my face
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Post Thu Oct 05, 2006 6:37 pm 
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Sharman



Joined: 26 Sep 2006
Posts: 219
Location: Plutonian Shore

Laughing
Post Thu Oct 05, 2006 6:56 pm 
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Mdm Prez



Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1536
Location: U.S. of A. 		Shar

 Thanks for stopping by...glad it made you smile.

Mdm Prez
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Post Thu Oct 05, 2006 8:24 pm 
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ghost



Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 2828
Location: MIA

LMAO, mdm, great write! wish i could have seen your face though...

ghost runs off laughing...

regards
ghost
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MIA

Post Thu Oct 05, 2006 10:37 pm 
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Jules



Joined: 22 Feb 2005
Posts: 904
Location: Home

oh my gosh...You poor thing lmao
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Never again
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 12:26 am 
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Allison



Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 4216
Location: Florida

Awww Mdm. A very cute write, but I hate that you didn't get your wax.....Alli says with a toothless grin Wink
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Alli
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 3:03 am 
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Eiregirl



Joined: 21 Jul 2005
Posts: 10230
Location: Chasing a pink bunny

Mdm,

When I had Deb read this she almost fell over laughing Laughing Laughing

Wonderful wonderful

Eiregirl Arrow
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All poems and stories posted by Eiregirl are Copyright 2005 - 2008 Aoibhegréine These literary works are my property under copyright. If you wish to use my work for any purpose please ASK FIRST.
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 4:06 am 
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Mdm Prez



Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1536
Location: U.S. of A. 		ghost

 Thanks for reading 'My Brazilian'. So glad it made you laugh, but why'd you run off so quickly?

Cat
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you're not asking the right questions.
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 11:11 am 
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chris



Joined: 26 Sep 2006
Posts: 467
Location: neverland

Laughing
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 11:28 am 
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Xalia1
Moderators


Joined: 05 May 2004
Posts: 3702
Location: In love

~laughs hard~

Great write Mdm...
Very amusing, LOL

Hugs,
Xalia
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Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 1:30 pm 
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Mdm Prez



Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1536
Location: U.S. of A. 		Jules

 Thanks for coming by to read this, Jules. Glad you could laugh at it.

So nice to see you here, I miss you.

Cat
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If you're not getting the answers you want,
you're not asking the right questions.

Last edited by Mdm Prez on Sat Oct 21, 2006 3:07 pm; edited 1 time in total
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 6:25 pm 
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desert-fish



Joined: 13 Apr 2006
Posts: 2777
Location: deleted

good grief... Laughing
Post Fri Oct 06, 2006 6:40 pm 
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Mdm Prez



Joined: 19 May 2005
Posts: 1536
Location: U.S. of A. 		Alli

 Thanks for reading about my escapade. By the way, nice gums.

Cat
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If you're not getting the answers you want,
you're not asking the right questions.
Post Sat Oct 07, 2006 7:36 pm 
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Allison



Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 4216
Location: Florida

You have some rather humorous adventures Mdm Wink Thanks for sharing them with us and giving us a good chuckle.

Alli
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Alli
Post Sat Oct 07, 2006 9:08 pm 
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ghost



Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 2828
Location: MIA

lol, mdm, i had to run away before anyone could start teasing me for not knowing what a brazilian wax was... are you still giving classes in shaving 101? lmao...

regards
ghost
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MIA

Post Sat Oct 07, 2006 9:48 pm 
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