Joined: 25 Dec 2007
Posts: 7
Location: Washington State
Ladies, I need some help..
Hey, yeah some of you know me, but most of you dont, I haven't been on as much as I would like to.
I'm still in the kind of 'what's going on?' Stage... Or the 'I want to come out, but what's going to happen if I do?'
I don't know.. I look around at all of the women around here and the general look of all the lesbians is like a punk-goth look..? I don't know if that's normal, but I just want to find a normal lesbian who I can come out with, or should I come out first?
I think I'm just too confused (or reading into the whole process too much ) to understand the feelings that are going on inside of me.
I know I don't make much sence, but have any of you watched "A Shot At Love With Tila Teqila"? Dani is the girl of my dreams. Or anyone that can come even remotly close to Dani.
I've been attracted physically to girls before (never admitting it of course) but I never knew that there were normal women out there who just prefered other women..
I've admitteed to people, not my mom and dad, that I am bi, and that I had one experience in the past with a woman, but I dont kow how to say that I like women more to the people around me.
Men (no offence to anyone who might get offended) are nothing more than objects to me, like I know that sounds mean, but I don't have feelings for them, I just get with guys because that's what society says is okay...
I know I'm all over the place here, but I'm so frustrated with all of this.
If anyone can read through that mess and understand it a tiny bit, any help would be greatly appreciated...
Really..
Thanks
*hugs to you all*
~Ally _________________ Good food is like living, wether it's sweet or sour it will always nourish and make you whole.
Sat Feb 02, 2008 10:16 pm
Cavewoman
Joined: 06 Sep 2005
Posts: 2056
Location: nearby
you sound like a NORMAL lady going through the NORMAL questions! questions! questions! phase of coming out.....
you make sense... and though you may feel like you're all over the map... you aren't... you're in one spot driving yourself dizzy...
stop. stand still a moment in your head.
sounds like you already know exactly how you feel with regards to your sexuality.... sounds like you already know exactly what you may like to do with your knowledge....
as to what do we look like? we look like you and your neighbor and the lady on the bus and that other lady at the airport .... even that one particular gal who crosses your path now and then at the mall...... we look like every lady in the whole wide world.... some have chosen to post their photos in the gallery, many and most haven NOT posted their photo....
what's going to happen if you DO come out? dunno really....
you'll probably feel relieved personally that some of the mystery is gone... depending on how your news is received, you might smile OR you might wanna duct tape your mouth... hard to tell sometimes how others will perceive your freedom of choice.... but then, really afterall, it is THEIR issue, not yours....
then what? well, then a journey begins... and each of our journeys is different... as is every personal journey..... you will want to meet women, be with women, and hopefully, someday, find a someone special .... it all takes time, patience, blundering, learning, and a bit of frustration... but you'll never know if you don't simply start to trust yourself, your thoughts and your feelings....
one foot in front of the other....
ready.... set.........
hmmmm.... what will you do?
go! = start your journey now...
or ... wait! = sit and spin some more...
its up to you...
but Mel's is a grand place to explore your thoughts aloud...
p.s.... if you read more of the boards.... and yeah, go back page after page after page after page reading former posts and replies, you just might find your same thoughts and feelings in a discussion... because truly, you sound absolutely normal! _________________ " The sorcerers in life are created within each of us" --- Lynn V. Andrews
Sun Feb 03, 2008 4:40 am
Dark prism
Joined: 10 Dec 2006
Posts: 865
Location: California Dreamin, baby.
GREAT reply, Cave!
I don't think you need to find someone else to come out 'with'. Unfortunatley (or fortunately), hon, this is a journey you usually take by yourself. What you are revealing to the important people in your life, has nothing to do with anyone else. You are gracing them with knowing the real you. How they handle it is up to them and you can't control it.
You are probably surrounded by other lesbians that look 'normal' that are wondering just like you do about how to find 'normal' looking lesbians. This seems to be a problem with us, which is why I wear some kind of jewelry that can subtly show someone who knows, exactly what I am (plus I'm proud to wear it). I have been wearing a rainbow beaded necklace for a year now. You might consider doing that, and who knows what sort of responses you might get from those 'normal' looking women who are just waiting for a clue to finding someone just like you.
Good luck, hon.
Dp _________________ "Fighting for this girl - on the battlefield of love."
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) to understand the feelings that are going on inside of me.
