If we could focus our attention on that explanation, it would be much easier for
the world to accept and embrace those who are transgender. Just like any other birth
defect, they do not ask to be this way. They are born in a way that does not allow them to
be their true self. We have created laws that protect nearly ever segment of society but
this doesn’t mean that the world as a whole accepts it. For the most part we have become
apathetic to anything that we are not comfortable with or that we do not understand.
Maybe by writing this I can help others understand not necessarily what makes a
transsexual but what makes us look at them the way we do and hopefully find a way to at
the very least tolerate their uniqueness and at best accept it.
Unfortunately the basis for the dislike of transsexuals stems from homophobia.
Homophobia is nothing more than the fear of a homosexual but why do so many people
use this as their basis for hate? Homosexuality has little or nothing to do with
transsexualism.
Gender is an identity given to us at birth and through up brining and even the
most well intentioned doctors and parents don’t always get it right. The creator has made
the human body so complex that it is impossible to ever truly understand it and the brain
is far more complex still that we only understand a fraction of how it works. Claiming to
know what a person is at birth does a dis-service to all of us.
With hate comes prejudice. Or is it with prejudice comes hate? These two go hand
in hand. Prejudice allows one group to discriminate against another based solely on a
difference in beliefs. Transsexuals, like so many other “abnormal” members of society,
have had to face the prejudice that comes with living their lives as they believe. They
have been forced to hide or even worse change. Prejudice has caused harm to the
transsexual and to the rest of us. If we tolerate the prejudice and hatred with one society
then we allow it to swell and take over more and more members of society till there is
one dominant group who can continue to dictate what is and is not allowed.
Those that believe in the hatred have embraced ethnocentrism with a passion.
They have been blinded by their right and have ignored the idea that anything else is
possible. If their view was so correct we would never see the things we have. The number
of important figures who identify as transsexuals is immense. The following are just a
short list:
Christine Jorgensen, born George William Jorgensen Jr. was one of the
first people in the world to have gender reassignment surgery. She grew up in the
Bronx, served in the armed forces and after leaving the service intended to have
the surgery. A lay over in Copenhagen gave her the opportunity and after some
years of hormone therapy, had a series of surgeries. Her vaginoplasty did not
occur till several years later when it became available here in the US. She was an
instant success when she returned to America when a headline ran announcing her
change. She was a pin up girl not only because of her instant celebrity status but
because she was a beautiful woman.
Georgina Beyer, Born in 1957, became the first openly
transsexual member of parliament in New Zealand in 1999 and served till 2007
when she chose to retire because she was uncomfortable with the environment she
was working in at the time.
Aya Kami Kawa, Was the first transsexual to seek public office in
Japan and became the first transsexual municipal official.
Renee Richards, A respected physician, is well known for being
the first transsexual tennis player. She requested to compete in the US open only
to be denied by the US Tennis Association in 1976. The Supreme Court ruled in
her favor in 1977 and she went on to compete successfully.
Steve Stanton, Fired from his job in Largo Florida because the
powers that be decided that he lost all integrity because he chose to be true to
himself.
Brandon Teena, Well known transsexual who, because of hysteria
created by hatred, was killed in 1993. The death was publicized in the Hollywood
block buster “Boys Don’t Cry” (Information provided by wikipedia.com)
All over the world we see the acceptance and hatred that ahs followed these
people. There isn’t a single part of this world that has not faced this issue at some time in
it’s history but some societies are more accepting than others. Why is this?
I guess we have to look at what makes everyone the way they are. Identity is an
important part of our selves. From early on we must form our own identity separate from
that which our families and friends have set for us. If we are lucky, we will have the love
and support of those around us to find our selves. Identity is created by those around us to
help us establish what is considered norm or acceptable. The problem with this is that
those around us cannot define what is normal for us. We can conform to their views but if
we do we are not always true to us.
Conformity makes us look at others for our own identity. Conforming denies us
our own individuality and creates sanctions on our personality. To not conform means
we become a deviant.
What makes a deviant? A deviant is looked on as someone worth disposal when
in fact the only thing that makes a deviant is someone who does not conform to the
societal norms. If this is the true basis for deviance then in fact we all are deviants in
some way or another. Vegetarians are deviants because the accepted norm is to eat
animal products. Those with nut allergies can be called deviants because peanut butter is
considered a normal food for all children. So in all reality a deviant is not evil, just
different from a group in society.
We tend to discriminate against anything we see as deviance. We set up a group
of outcasts by merely believing that anything different than we are, is wrong.
Discrimination has proven time and time again to be ineffective to combat perceived
problems. Each generation has given way to some law that prohibits discrimination. If
this is not proof that discrimination breeds problems then I don’t know what does.
Every facet of society, regardless of where the society is based, has an ideology
that keeps that society moving. The ideology may be wrong but as a general rule it is
what keeps a balance and harmony alive. Without some sort of ideology that we all agree
on, conflict would be a constant and there would never be any kind of advancement. An
ideology can be changed when all those who share it are willing to look outside their
circle and embrace the changes that are occurring around them.
The biggest problem with ideology is that people accept it as gospel and have a
hard time looking beyond that ideology. It’s not always easy to change when one thing is
all you have ever known but if you look throughout history you will find that those who
chose to follow the status quo have long ago died off and those who Changed with time
have flourished.
The accepted rolls we all play, while important, can be highly interchangeable.
There was a time in history when the men took care of the farm, built the houses, made
sure that the family had what it needed and the women took care of the men. This was the
accepted norm for many years. With the increase in wars, the men have been gone far
more and the women have been forced to pick up where the men left off. As a result
women have learned that they too have the ability to do the things that were once
reserved for men. More than that they realized that in many cases they enjoyed it.
Gender rolls have become far less important in today’s society. We see men doing
what was once thought of as “women’s work” and women enjoying the satisfaction that
comes with a hard days work. Women are no longer expected to stay at home and men
are more accepted as stay at home fathers.
The lines of gender accepted status has changed so why is there so much fear and
hatred towards someone who does not conform to these genders? Because, while we
accept that each gender has its own identity, the idea of gender is something that most
people never think about. Much like many things in life, we accept what we are told and
learn to not question it. Those born into Republican families are far more likely to be
republican because that is all they know and accept it as the only way life should be. To
break away from what we have been taught, take the time to truly evaluate who we are
and accept that, takes courage and has its own set of problems. For many of us the only
fact that they know is their gender. Everything else can be a variable. For others, gender
too is a variable that we can change and do so to allow our body to come into balance
with our mind.
We put far too much effort into trying to control what is around us and not enough
attention on ourselves. Social control let’s those who feel they don’t have enough control
over their own lives to have control over something. Laws are set up to protect society at
large but accepted norms do nothing to protect anyone. Social control demeans those who
are excluded under such control and creates an environment where imbalance favors
those with truly the least control of all.
Transsexuals have fought social control almost since birth. At the moment of their
birth, they emerge to someone is power who determines what gender the child is. At that
moment, everything the child learns is based on that title given to them. “boy” or “girl” is
nothing more than a word. From that moment we are controlled by our parents,
Hollywood, mass marketing, our friends, out enemies, or anyone else who feels they have
the right to tell us who we are. We have learned throughout the years that trying to
control that much of a child life is harmful and have started to back off and let them make
more of their own decisions. Why can’t our gender be as elastic?
Transsexuals alienate themselves or are alienated by society because they do not
conform and are misunderstood. They become withdrawn, self medicate, often times
resort to suicide because no one understands how they feel, not even themselves most
times.
How can any of this change? Communication, understanding, tolerance,
acceptance, and sheer will. Communication, while it may cause conflict initially, is the
only way to understand where each side is coming from. Communication takes away the
mystery that transsexualism creates and opens the door to better understanding of each
other and ourselves. If we are to understand others we must first look inside our selves
and ask what makes us who we are. In the end what makes us who we are is no different
than what makes anyone else who they are. We are just different. Difference is not a bad
thing. If we were all the same our world would be a very boring place.
Why is it you
Who is supposed to be
My sister, my family
Feel the need
To define me
Make me fit into
One of your little
Gender boxes
Why can’t I just
Be who I am
Neither Pink or Blue
But maybe stripped
Or even polka-dotted
But either way
I am NOT an Illness
I am a person
Pink, Blue or
Somewhere in between (wishonastar, melswebs.com)
Whether one decides to go with hormones or surgery or both does not change who
the person is on the inside. Surgery may make them appear more socially acceptable but
what does that mean to the inside of a person? A person is more than just a package. The
are a heart and soul with feelings and plans and a dream.
Open your heart and mind to what the world has to offer. Allow yourself to
imagine what kind of a world this would be if we all conformed to every norm that
society has created. Imagine what your life would be like if someone had not opened the
door for you to be who you as do as you wish. You have the freedom to be who you are
and be who you want because someone before you took a chance, stood up against the
standards set by previous generations and let the world know that it was not ok to
discriminate against anyone based on religion, color, creed, race, gender, or disability.
Let’s work on making it a reality that there is no discrimination based on anything that
someone sees as deviant. We are all deviants in one way or another and do not have the
right to dictate who is and who is not normal. _________________
Wishing you were
somehow here again
wishing you were
somehow near
Sometimes it seemed
if I just dreamed
somehow you would
be here
Thu May 24, 2007 6:57 am
wishonastar
Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Posts: 967
Location: Where I belong
wonderfully written Coconut
I like the way in wich you state your opions in a non-threatening way.
it really does give a person more of a sence of where people like me are coming from as well as the different levels of transgernderism.
Great Job!!! hope you got a good grade on this paper.
ps love the pome _________________ I'm not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing
But I’m missing way too much
So when do I give up, what I’ve been wishing for.
Down - Jason Woods
Thu May 24, 2007 9:40 pm
coconut
Joined: 13 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
*pout*
My instructor is a poopy head and I still have no idea what grade I got on that or the oral presentation that followed.
She did say that if i email her she will let me know but she has yet to tell me and i really really need to know.
Oh
Something that came out of the oral presentation
Tolerance is not an option
Anything less than full acceptance is unacceptable.
Funny thing about that
I head someone else say that same thing in a whole other class this week. He heard it form a friend who heard it from a friend
Now they are talking about a t shirt with that on it
Who knew that a stupid line in an oral report that I didn't want to do from the very beginning would make it's way across a college campus
As soon as I know my grade I will let you know
Oh
And I like the poem loads _________________
Wishing you were
somehow here again
wishing you were
somehow near
Sometimes it seemed
if I just dreamed
somehow you would
be here
Thu May 24, 2007 9:47 pm
wishonastar
Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Posts: 967
Location: Where I belong
quote:Originally posted by coconut:
Tolerance is not an option
Anything less than full acceptance is unacceptable.
Now they are talking about a t shirt with that on it
sign me up for one if they do get made!!! i absoultly love that line. you go girl!!! who knows that a project like yours could change the would for a lot of people!!! _________________ I'm not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing
But I’m missing way too much
So when do I give up, what I’ve been wishing for.
quote:Originally posted by coconut:
Tolerance is not an option
Anything less than full acceptance is unacceptable.
Now they are talking about a t shirt with that on it
sign me up for one if they do get made!!! i absoultly love that line. you go girl!!! who knows that a project like yours could change the would for a lot of people!!!
I have one of those T-shirts!!
Nice paper cuppy
Eiregirl _________________ All poems and stories posted by Eiregirl are
Copyright 2005 - 2008 Aoibhegréine
These literary works are my property under copyright. If you wish to use my work for any purpose please ASK FIRST.
Sun May 27, 2007 3:28 am
luvinmomofone1
Joined: 26 Oct 2007
Posts: 40
Location: oklahoma usa
i am not as eloquent in writing as all you seem to be and sometimes when i ihave a view i dont put it down because i feel out of my league in writing these essays and feelings down on paper.
but, every once in a while i feel strongly about a subject and want to make a comment..sometimes i dont becauase of personal based rejection issues or because as i said before i feel out of my leauge and cannot write as well as just about anyone in here.
transgederism and trangendered ppl are the nicest ppl i have EVER met in my life. my best and oldest friend....we have been friends since right after my son was born..hes 17 now....is a transgender! then when she took the hormones and she would get them from mexico alot of time and bring them over the border. once i went with her and i carried the hormones and got stopped and they were taken and I had to write a statement . i found out then that bringing the hormones across the bordrer was illegal..a class 2 something felony! they let me go since i had never beeen to mexico before let alone was a drug runner of HORMONES. i thought it was the stupidist thing! my friend jamie got mad and was cussin stating that hes been doing it for over 10 years. i told him to shut up and i just signed the paper cause i knew it would never happen to me again for a fact! after that he could take the risk himself. but i think he more or less stopped the hormones then because of that issue.
i was bisexual then and had left my husband over drug issues..his not mine! we used to dress up and go out to the straight bars and gay and lesbian bars and party a little. it was kinda fun to go into a straight bar and do nothing and just act normal. if there was a problem with someones predjudice..i as a woman..would be the one to straighten it out and stick up for my friends innocence and rights. he was an UGLY woman! very horsey face. he is an ugly androg. which is how he lives now but he is in his late 50's now so does not dress up.
i never could understand one thing about him. he lived as a woman but had to do it outside of home because of his elderly parents he lived with..he would dress up and wear coveralls over his clothes or get changed in the car! his breasts were real from taking hormones and his reletionships were mostly with women. he was the only trandgendered male that i have ever met that was wanting to be a woman to be a lesbian. it was kinda fummy weird. i can say that cause shes a really best friend. she lives in arizona, i live in oklahoma, every couple years i go to arizona to see my family and spend sometimes a week with jamie at her house.we he calls himself he now..and is androg...still lives wiht his elderly, very nice..2nd mom to me mom.
he never felt that he was a man. he always felt that he was a women just god played a trick on him!! he never could afford reassignment surgery so only took the hormones..which ravaged his body and i think his mind at times...hes on perm. pms!!
so now that hes older hes givein up on his dream to be complete. he seems ok with it but he seems very unhappy and an angry person now. he never got angry with me when i visitied the last 2 years. mom was glad to see me and his sister even broght me some clothes..hand me downs. we are all poor. they know me as a true friend to their so called weird son/brother! this is how they look at him ...not me! he loses his temper over nothing now. just blows his top. yells hollers..i am confused with these actions from him. he makes me refer to him as jim now and as a him not as jamie and as a him not like i have in all the years i knew her.i still refer to him as jamie even to his mom. his dad who was mostly against him has died years ago..so now just mom and shes not in good health...very classy nice lady. very fragile and nice. i really like her!i
i ramble on because i like to talk about my friendship with jamie to ppl who dont know. my son was involved in this friendship since birth and at 17 nows understands the stigmata associated with transgendered ppl but does not care because he was raisied around one. he is not predijudiced against color or sex or sexual prefrence. if your his friend, your his friend..no questions! this is the way as a single mother i raisied him. i know my son is straight not bi or gay. but as of yet is still a virgin and never even been on a date or had his first kiss as far as i know. but enuff about my son! .lol. i ramble again! sorry
i just believe that transgendered ppl are just misunderstood and more predjudiced against than even gay or lesbian ppl. from experience and not just jamie..i have had loads of transgenedered friends over the years..they say i keep my freak flag flyin high all my life..that is just a figure of speech~~ i have always sought out friendship out of the normal range of persons. the outcasts of society cause i am an outcast myself! but to alot of transgendered their attitude is for the pride to be themselves but i also know a few who are more beautiful as women but stay transgendered because of pride but also in a tumbs you nose kinda way..its too hard ot explain! just ..i am not predijudiced, my son is not predjudiced, i think my mother is not a predjudiced at least not with anyone but a family member. she is not predjudice wth me about my sexuality. we discuss things sometimes when i visit.
i just was reminicing on my friend who i missed for the last 2 years but talk to on the phone~ if i have taken away from your time to read dribble i am sorry! this is how i feel..i dont know how to write in any other fashion since i dont do it usually! i am better taking the oral exam than the written one..learning disability...oral is bad to tho! lol. i just wanted to espress these jumbled up inside feelings i have on this subject! _________________ ~welcome to my world! grab a cuppa and have a seat~/
Sun Oct 28, 2007 2:02 pm
coconut
Joined: 13 Feb 2006
Posts: 238
The mood changes associated with hormones is nothing new to me. When you change the core chemical make up of your body things are bound to happen. I have known a few people who have undergone transition and all of them be they MTF or FTM have had some sort of mood issues. Anger seems to be the most prominent thing though.
I'm glad she has a friend like you and that you can see beyond what society and her family sees. _________________
Wishing you were
somehow here again
wishing you were
somehow near
Sometimes it seemed
if I just dreamed
somehow you would
be here
Sun Oct 28, 2007 7:46 pm
luvinmomofone1
Joined: 26 Oct 2007
Posts: 40
Location: oklahoma usa
thank you coconut... out of all the ppl i have met in my life...the only one i have kept as a friend as long as jamie has been family. i have no other ppl that have been friends with me as long as we have. i miss our going out and raising hell together!! too bad i am too old to raise hell now..i leave that to my son whos 17 if i can only get him away from his xbox and the computer to get a real life!! _________________ ~welcome to my world! grab a cuppa and have a seat~/
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