Hi ladies. You will probably roll your eyes when you read my stereotypical 'coming out' problem, but even the smallest amount of advice might help me. I'm 20 years old, and since I was 16 I had only had feelings for women (even though I dated guys). Two years ago I came out to a few of my friends, and lost most of them as they didn't 'approve'. I am terrified of coming out to the majority of the new friends I have made, and also to my family who are christian and often express hatred towards gay people. Its obviously hard to meet women if nobody knows your gay but I just don't know where to start. How did you get from being 'in the closet' to being in a meaningful relationship?
Thu Feb 01, 2007 1:01 pm
charliegirl
Joined: 04 Jan 2007
Posts: 98
Location: Queensland Australia
Im from a small country town so I can understand the acceptance part. I packed up my bags and went and spent a week in Brisbane!! I went to the beat and meet a great girl who I stayed in a relationship for 6 months. My town is so small finding anyone is very hard. I was seeing a girl but she got a boyfriend just after she hooked up with me. She wants both of us but thats no longer something I want. Im heading to Brissy on thurs for a concert and I cant wait!! Love brissy!
Sat Feb 03, 2007 6:20 am
kultis
Joined: 17 May 2005
Posts: 341
Location: a finn living in dutchland atm..
First of all, Jessica, if you lose your so called 'friends' because you are gay, they are not your friends. Friends are who will be there no matter who you are or what you do.
Second of all, I see you're from Australia, right? No offence, but I've been hearing that Aussies are really narrow-minded when it comes to being gay.
And third of all, I started coming out slowly to my friends. None of them left me because of that. (This happened when I was maybe 16 or 17) Maybe they got scared for a little while but after that they are my best friends now, partly because of that.
I'm also from a small town and it's not easy here. The thing is, I don't care what people think about me, not anymore. I'm sure there are lot of rumors going on about me and yes, I've been insecure about that but mostly I've been scared that my parents get to know about my true identity. I just recently came out to my parents (it's been out there for a while but now I got the courage to actually admit it). My dad is a huge homophobe and he's uncomfotable a lot of times. We both try to respect each other's views - I won't make out in front of him and he will try his best to accept me.
Most of all, it is really important to be yourself. It helps in a place where no one knows you and you tell you're lesbian straight away that way they can either accept it or leave it. No confuses.
I don't if this helped you at all. Try to take care and let me know how you are.
Kultis
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but I just don't know where to start. How did you get from being 'in the closet' to being in a meaningful relationship?
