well...a few days ago i flew from my hometown which is a small town on the tennessee-carolina border border to memphis. i normally fly out there once every two months to spend some time with my mom and older brother. i normally stay with my brother, but he let it slip to mom that i was going to be in town. therefore, she insitsed that i stay with her. last night i went to brother's halloween party. we all started getting pretty wasted he started getting all of these crazy calls from my mom and my cousin nikki. he finally looked at me and told me,"go to mom's house...she kows". my stomch turned upside down and i threw up jose cuervo in my system. my brother called me a cab and i made him come with me. i needed him, he has always been there for me through a lot of shit with our mom and we both despised her.
i open the door to find a frantic mom. the first ting she said to me was "you...dyke. you..have ruied everything!" then she slapped me. i fell to the floor and after that all that was said and done is kind of blurry. apparently, i left my phone at home and she went through all of my messages to my girlfriend. before calling my brother she called my best friend and cousin nikki. she told her that i was a lesbian and that my girlfriend is nikki's friend too. CAN YOU FREAKING BELIEVE THAT? in my drunken stuper according to my brother i was yellign and screaming at her and telling her how much i hated her and have always hated her. then i grabbed my phone out of her hand causing he to stumble. i ran outsdie sat in the yard and called mt gf and just cried for what seemed like forever. while i was on the phone my brother packed all of my stuff for me then we went to his apt. i just layed in his bed and cried myself to sleep. i've just been moaping around all day.
i leave in the morning to go back home and i can't wait to just be in my gf's arms where everythign feels so safe.
i cannot believe this happened. i think i'm just in shock. i know nikki does not know how to keep a secret so everyone at home knows. i don't know what to do. everyone probably knows...all my friends co-workers. word travels fast in my town, and everyone knows everyone else. i'm really scared but i want to be able to look everyone in the face with pride no matter what kind of backlash i get. geze....lets hope i can stay strong even though i know i can't. _________________ you don't have to be rich to be my girl
you don't have to be cool to rule my world
ain't no
particular sign I'm more compatible with
I just want
your extra time and your . . .
kiss.
Sat Oct 28, 2006 5:09 am
Guest
Oh my god... I don't even know what to say!
I don't mean to offend but your mother was a total beast. Don't let that get to you. Even tough there are times when we *know* our parents aren't right, still we emotionally feel guilty... Don't let that happen.
This sounds like a cliche... I know... but stick to your friends' support. I just can't believe that everyone will let you down. For sure you have *real* friends to support you and be at your side towards others at this phase.
Best of luck**...
Sat Oct 28, 2006 9:40 am
Loretta
Joined: 25 Oct 2006
Posts: 70
Location: Somewhere.
P.S. - Oh, forgot to login...
Sat Oct 28, 2006 9:42 am
miss rebecca
Joined: 21 Oct 2006
Posts: 99
Location: neverland
she is a beast. which is why i live ten hours away from her and always have my whole life. she's left me down my whole life then she thinks she has something to say to me about being gay AFTER invading my privacy! ummm...hell no!
the only support i have is from my g/f and a few of my gay guy friends.
i don't know if this is just me but, i find that it seems to be more accepcted for men to come out as gay then it is for women.
i arrived in konxville a few hours ago and i haven't realy been out in public expect i went to the only like general store my small town has. most of the people who work there have known me my whole life. i heard two girls saying, "oh yeah...did you hear? our prom queen is a big 'ol dyke now. i don't see why she's so pretty she could easily get a boyfriend." my g/f also said that someone was saying our boyfriends must have beaten us cause there's no other way that two girls would turn lesbian."
so so so so so closed minded. oh well atleast i'm moving in jan. _________________ you don't have to be rich to be my girl
you don't have to be cool to rule my world
ain't no
particular sign I'm more compatible with
I just want
your extra time and your . . .
kiss.
Sat Oct 28, 2006 6:31 pm
Mystic
Joined: 23 Oct 2006
Posts: 194
hey rebecca
i don't know what to say. i am really sorry that happened.
i do not think you will get that response everywhere.
mystic
Wed Nov 01, 2006 2:42 am
Guest
sorting through the wreckage
I am so sorry you have to feel the pain that you must be feeling. On the brite side of this you will find out who your true friends are and who you can depend on. Things will get better and you always have Mel's for support. Your mom had no right to hit you or say the things she did. I will never understand why people hate. Its a terrible emotion... A mother should love her children no matter what. I you ever feel down just look in the eyes of your gf and know there is nothing in the world that makes you feel more loved and then of course kiss her.
I wish you and your gf the best and hope things are getting better. Star
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