Hi All. So I'm bisexual and I'm just wondering honestly, no hard feelings, what so many people's problem with the idea of bisexuality is. I'm not doing it to be trendy although I know it seems to be a becoming fad that's how I am. I have been attracted to both for as far as I can remember. So could anyone tell me what some people's problem with it is?
Thu Apr 13, 2006 5:38 am
Cavewoman
Joined: 06 Sep 2005
Posts: 2056
Location: nearby
no problem here... to each our own... enjoy. _________________ " The sorcerers in life are created within each of us" --- Lynn V. Andrews
Thu Apr 13, 2006 11:08 am
smallapple
Joined: 25 Mar 2006
Posts: 245
Location: dublin ireland
i have no problem with bisexuality but never had a happy ending with them. i tend to avoid bisexuals for the simple reason that they always seem to go back to men. for some reason i find that hard to eccept. i have no problem with bisexuals but i tend to be very wary of them and thier male friends.
but just like you said cavewoman to each is own. thats what its all about isnt it. fully agreed.
Thu Apr 13, 2006 1:02 pm
DanceofSorrows
Joined: 29 Aug 2004
Posts: 2837
"what so many people's problem with the idea of bisexuality is," Who knows? Why focus too much on the small minority of bias?
Dance~
Thu Apr 13, 2006 1:05 pm
Pantone Tria
Joined: 04 Apr 2006
Posts: 20
Location: My own reverie on the coast of Baltic sea
I understand what you're talking about, alidile.
I also had relationship with both genders since i was a teenager.
It seems like i keep on switching between female and male... it's not my intention... it just happened!
When people asked... i told them that i have been in relationship wth both guys and girls... then they said "so you're bisexual".
Well it's just another box people wanna put you in. Even though i'm not happy being called bisexual. (because sexuality doesn't drive me to behave like this... it's something else which i don't know!) And i think reason why people have a negative feeling about bisexuality because many (people who called themselves) bisexual just doing it for fun.
BTW i agree with Smallapple...
I know that one day i have to choose between les or straight... you cannot keep on doing this in-between thing if you believe in monogamy, right?
Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:28 pm
katla12
Joined: 24 Feb 2006
Posts: 70
Location: Los Angeles, California, USA
Bisexuality
Both my Ex-Lovers were BI. Both had been married with children. I once questioned bisexuality myself but had to retract my beliefs when I realized that the two women I had loved loved men also.I have no problem accepting it now. _________________ Tell Me About You? I Want to Know More!
Thu Apr 13, 2006 4:58 pm
bellaO
Joined: 11 Apr 2006
Posts: 9
I think that bisexuality makes straight people and gay people jealous! As Woody Allan said, "bisexuality immediately doubles your chance of getting a date for Saturday night!"
SmallApple,
"i have no problem with bisexuality but never had a happy ending with them."
Do you have a lot of happy "endings" with lesbians? In my experience, the ending is what sucks, not who they went to after it ended!
I honestly think that the problem is the same one that straight people have about gays... they think that being gay means you can't be trusted around the same sex... like it is the same as a crazy sex addiction... a lesbian who dates a bisexual thinks the bisexual can't be trusted around men. Of course that doesn't make any sense when you really think about it. You are either committed or you are not. Your sexual identity doesn't play a role.
Thu Apr 13, 2006 10:30 pm
mademinx
Joined: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 63
Further to Pantone Tria's comments
I am Bisexual,
From experience I have a problem with it. It makes monogomy difficult. If all I wanted was a woman I would be satisifed with one woman. If all I wanted was a man I could be satisifed with one man. However, if I am with a man, as I am now. I still fantasise about being with a woman. I obviously have to make a choice BUT I don't want to.
Minxy. _________________ If I put up no pretense and your affection stays true. You have set me free and I am yours.
Fri Apr 14, 2006 12:39 am
alidile
Joined: 16 Mar 2006
Posts: 6
Location: canada
I don't think I understand where monogomy is a problem when it comes to bisexuality and where there would be a loss of trust. The way I see it because I may be attracted to both sexes if I am in a relationship with someone where the agreement is that the relationship is to be monogomous then it is. If not, it's a problem with the person not because of their sexual preference but they are just not trustworthy. People can be attracted to only one sex and still be untrustworthy. The reason I'd always heard from people was because bisexuals use it as an excuse to have multiple partners but those people are in my opinion not real bisexuals, perhaps more addicted to the idea of sex itself, or would have multiple partners even if straight or gay. Does that make any sense? Because if so beyond that I don't understand what any problem would be.
By the way I'm not focusing on this, was more a question of curiosity that I could get really honest answers because people are often frightened of offending in person Thanks.
Fri Apr 14, 2006 3:37 am
Dueceswild
Joined: 13 Apr 2005
Posts: 304
Location: WV
I think that the problem I would have dating a bi is that I would always wonder in the back of my head if she thought I was enough or if what she really wanted was a dick.....
Because lets face it just because you are honest with that person, we can't be sure if they will be honest with you! I know all of this may seem very insecure, but honestly I think that would be a fear!
D _________________ Never do anything you don't want to have to explain to the paramedics!
Fri Apr 14, 2006 5:43 pm
Anne
Joined: 02 Jan 2006
Posts: 20
It sounds like the main problem actually being discussed is a commitment issue. I'd argue that it has more to do with the individual, rather than their orientation. For to blame it on such is too cheap and simple.
Last edited by Anne on Sat Apr 15, 2006 2:09 am; edited 1 time in total
Fri Apr 14, 2006 6:40 pm
DiegoRider
Joined: 14 Apr 2006
Posts: 5
I think some of the issues come from a misunderstanding of bisexuality or how some bisexuals are (meaning commitment issues).
I consider myself both bi and a lesbian. I have not been with a man for 16 years, but had many happy relationships with men and if my current gf left (we've been together 10 years), I wouldn't rule out either gender.
So I feel that I could be happy with either gender. But some people either feel differently or worry that their partner feels differently about it....some see bisexuality not as I could be happy with either, but as I can't be satisfied with just one or the other.
Not being happy with either is more a commitment issue, which they would probably have if they were straight, too.
Sat Apr 15, 2006 1:43 am
paradox58
Joined: 15 Apr 2006
Posts: 1
bisexual or just captivated by one?
here's my situation....
From puberty on through adulthood, the possibility that I was a lesbian never entered my mind....My relationships with men (as a teenager and as an adult) were always based on sex but were never emotionally or physically satisfying or felt very safe..20 years and two children later.....
I met the woman who completes me...after focusing five years on developing a professional relationship and then cultivating a friendship, we finally acknowledged the chemistry between us...the first kiss (intended by each of us to be the only kiss) ignited a passion and drew us together in a powerful way...2 years later we are still lovers...friends...colllegues...and not sure what to do next...
am I bi-sexual (that scares her..) or a lesbian (that scares me..especially since I have lived my adult life as straight.) but we both agree the emotional, physical, intellectual, and spiritual connection is complete and like none other...
so maybe I need to just wear the t-shirt that says "I'm not a lesbian, my girlfriend is..." and why do I have to choose a label anyway,
thoughts? reactions? advice?
Sat Apr 15, 2006 2:49 am
Xalia1 Moderators
Joined: 05 May 2004
Posts: 3702
Location: In love
Ok... I was avoiding this issue because I don't like to talk about this often, but I just couldn't help myself this time.
I am bisexual, and I am open with it. I have always been attracted to men, and I have always been attracted to women as well.
I have always viewed sex objectively, and I do not really let it rule my heart at all...
Sex with a man is fine, and sex with a woman is GREAT, it really doesn't matter to me which gender I am with.
I base things mostly on an emotional level. If I find the person stimulating through their personality and feel connected to them, I know there's a chance we will be good in bed together.
When I am in a relationship, (man or woman) I am committed to that person, and do not feel the need to sleep with other people. The mindset that bisexuals will sleep with anyone just really pisses me off.
A LOT of people (gay & straight) have a problem with bisexuals because they don't understand it. People fear and distrust what they don't understand. It's not easy being in the middle of these prejudices, but you can't help who you are.
Ok, I'm done rambling here, but just had to add my imput.
Thanks for reading!
Xalia
*I apologize if any offense was taken, none was meant* _________________ Nobody said life would be easy...They just promised it would be worth it.
~♥♥~
~The words fail me.. because what I feel for you is beyond description...~
Sat Apr 15, 2006 7:04 am
beautifullyjaded
Joined: 04 Sep 2005
Posts: 289
Location: lost in love
More power to you Xalia! Personally, I'm as gay as the day is long, but I'm probibly the most opinionated lesbian you'll find. I don't fear bisexuals (or any lover) because, quite frankly, if I'm not enough to satisfy you then you can just go to hell. That sounds harsh, and cocky, but it's not. The way I see things is this: if you love me, and I mean truely love me, you won't want to stray. If you love me I will be enough for you and you will desire no other. This isn't to say that you won't find others attractive, this simply means that you won't run off and fuck them. You won't want to. I will be enough. So you see where I come from. Anyway, just my two cents worth.
hugs,
Bj _________________ You've jaded me and that's beautiful
*************
There is no such thing as normal
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum
Gallery
FAQ
Profile PM's 
Thanks.
