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Finding My True Self

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Capricorn

Joined: 11 Sep 2004
Posts: 5
Location: Texas

Finding My True Self

I've always known there was something different about me. I would catch myself checking other women out. I used to get crushes on girls when I was very young. I always thought there was something wrong with me and one day I would meet the "right guy" and fall in love and that would be the end of my the crazy feelings I felt myself having towards other women. When I was 12 years old I had my first kiss. It was with another girl it was wonderful. I was still trying to tell myself I was straight though and the years went by. I never dated or kissed a guy until this year. I thought if I slept with a guy it would make change me some how. But I've since realized the truth about myself... and I have accepted the fact that I have sexual feelings for women. This is all still new to me though and most people don't know about it. I have a fear of not being accepted by my family and friends because of it. I don't know what to do. Sad

Sat Sep 11, 2004 7:35 pm

Tigger
Site Admin

Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 890

Welcome Capricorn

Well thats a difficult one as everyone reacts differently...there is only you that will know if it is right to tell them and when.

Through my experience of myself and my friends.... I have found that most parents and friends accept you for what you are as they love you for you and not your sexuality.

Sometimes it does take a little time for your parents and other to adjust to the news and may need a little bit of space.

Hope all goes well for you.

Tigs Rolling Eyes

Sat Sep 11, 2004 9:48 pm

Capricorn

Joined: 11 Sep 2004
Posts: 5
Location: Texas

Thanks... I'm sure most of the people I know will eventually accept me for who I am. I'm not too sure about my dad though. The weird thing is it would be more acceptable by my family if I were a gay male. I have a couple of cousins that are gay... and they are both men. My family doesn't treat them any differently however one of my older sisters had a couple of friends. Everyone in my family thought they were both great people until they found out they were lesbians. I wasn't even allowed to stay with my sister... who was living with one of them at the time because my parents were sure I would be molested by her(the friend). They were also worried that my sister's friends would "turn me gay" if I was around them too much.

Sun Sep 12, 2004 5:27 pm

Jaci

Joined: 12 Sep 2004
Posts: 14

"coming out" and letting others know about your sexuality is definatley a hard decsion...trying to figure out the right words, right time, and so on. It's something I'm dealing with also, so I do know how you feel and where you're coming from. From my own experience, I've talked with a few close friends and the response has been very positive. The one I'm most worried about is my mom. I have a friend who is a lesbian and I'm expecting the "she turned you gay" speech or "it's just a phase." I want to let others know but I'm apprehensive about the reaction. My best advice...do it when you're ready...(I'm working on taking my own advice too). Smile

Best of luck.

~Jaci

Wed Sep 15, 2004 6:20 am

spenz
Guest

press on, baby...everybody's situation is different. Just...press on. Try not to worry too much....just, press on

Sat Oct 16, 2004 2:04 am

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