Joined: 05 Jun 2005
Posts: 224
Location: Australia
absolutely
Mac _________________ Be generous in prosperity and thankful in adversity.
Mon Aug 29, 2005 2:33 pm
melons Site Admin
Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 2371
I definitely have to disagree with your comment...and...isn't life also what we make of it!
Mel
Mon Aug 29, 2005 3:35 pm
marie
Joined: 18 Dec 2004
Posts: 16
okay well maybe not every way but in one major way it sucks really bad, and yes life is what we make it but you dont get to pick who you fall in love with you dont get to pick when to fall out of love, you dont get to "make" that at all so i have no control over how bad my heart hurts which makes my life suck.
so melons tell me how do i "make" life better?
marie
Mon Aug 29, 2005 3:44 pm
RunninAway
Joined: 14 Oct 2004
Posts: 159
Location: Midwest United States
OK, no one can tell you how to "make" your life better, that's up to you. If there is someone who can answer that question for you, please have them contact me, I want them in my address book for when I have a really crappy day.
Life may seems like it sometimes sucks, but it doesn't always suck in every way, there has got to be something going on at any given time that doesn't suck, and if nothing else, the fact that you are able to breathe and type your feelings should be something that you can find some happiness in.
Love, well love is the great equalizer, it can lift anyone up, and it can tear them down just as fast, but if you feel it, that's great, even if it's not returned. The fact that you feel it means you are capable of doing so, you're not some dried up, bitter, shell of a person, you are a human being, so get out there and start being human.
I wish you peace and love marie, but no one can give it to you, you have to find it for yourself, so start looking..........
Chin up girl. _________________ I need some insanity of that temporary kind.....
Mon Aug 29, 2005 5:24 pm
melons Site Admin
Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 2371
(((marie)))
yes, when our love is trampled on I think we can all feel that 'life sucks.' There is no magical cure other than to try to get over the hurt and in time the hurt does get easier, trust me. It may be worth trying to do other things to occupy your mind and tire yourself out physically so that you don't dwell on things and so the hurt can't grow in proportion. Another woman will eventually come along to tempt your heart and that ray of sunshine will be as bright as it always was.....and you will be thinking 'isn't life grand, afterall....'
Hugs,
Mel x
Mon Aug 29, 2005 7:01 pm
sothernnite
Joined: 12 Jun 2005
Posts: 259
Location: South Georgia
ya know the one thing about life that always amazes me?
no matter what happens, it will always go on... with or without you.
so having been in love more than once but not enough for it to be a fake feeling, i think i can tell you that it might suck right now... hell it will probably suck next month.... but if you want to sit and wallow in self pity and hurt....that will make the sucky part last longer.
so take time to mourn that loss... but only you can make it stop sucking. and if you choose not to, then if ya life continues to suck, you're the one to blame.
now i'm nobody's mama, and i dont know you at all, so all this i have said has come from a part of me that has already dealt with that period in everyone's lifetime where everything sucks. and it is coming from someone who has moved on and found something better... so i can look back a couple of years ago when i thought life was sooooo good...and realize that when i thought i had found the love of my life, it was just Goddess showing me something that would make me appreciate the really good stuff.
sothernnite
Thu Sep 01, 2005 1:49 am
Guest
Marie,
I know I don't know you,so I hope I'm not overstepping...
I just wanted to say that I am sorry you're hurting right now. I have been thru heartache in my life as well and I know how it is to think it will just NEVER end. But it will and you'll come out on the other side...a stronger, more capeable woman than you were before.
HUGS to you, and hang in there.
Thu Sep 01, 2005 3:18 am
Cavewoman
Joined: 06 Sep 2005
Posts: 2056
Location: nearby
It does suck when what you believed was a foundation and wellspring of all good things, crumbles apart and stops flowing....And I remember sitting around for about a week feeling like a trainwreck that nobody cared about.
Then I decided, as several ladies wrote, to begin taking care of myself.
I figure you don't really feel like expending energy right now; but ya should. If the "fix yourself" is to be done, it needs to be done right, and that means by you.
What the #@$ am I talking about. Locate a project, something that right now probably doesn't seem very appealing, but do it anyway. Paint a room, clean out the basement, develop and plant a garden, buy a broken down motorcyle-tear it to pieces-put it back together again. Just get a project, something that involves your body actively... and do it.
It works. In the process, you begin reclaiming yourself, identifying with your own abilities, expanding your world, giving something back to yourself.
Like Nike says, just do it.....Cause sitting on your butt wrapped up in depression won't help....
And I am sorry. It will stop hurting with time.
Thu Sep 08, 2005 3:12 am
marie
Joined: 18 Dec 2004
Posts: 16
it hasnt stopped hurting but the thing is now its like do i even want this woman, yes i would sleep with her at any given moment of the day BUT do i really want to spend my life with someone like her, i mean i could go on and on about the bad things about her, BUT this is where i find myself, call it selfish but i dont want her to be happy with someone else, maybe its just me being 21 but i dont know, cause what im feeling right now isnt a broken heart its more anger toward her than anything i mean dont get me wrong i like her still but im so mad at her, that the heart ache isnt really there, like it was, does this make sense?
marie
Thu Sep 08, 2005 1:59 pm
Mac
Joined: 05 Jun 2005
Posts: 224
Location: Australia
Makes perfect sense. hang in there champion. u'l b rite.
mac. _________________ Be generous in prosperity and thankful in adversity.
Thu Sep 08, 2005 3:28 pm
Cavewoman
Joined: 06 Sep 2005
Posts: 2056
Location: nearby
There are several stages to the grieving process.... Anger is high on the list..... what you feel is very normal... keep puttin one foot in front of the other... it's not your age; many of us have been through exactly what you are now experiencing and we've lived to tell and to find more love. Give yourself time....
Thu Sep 08, 2005 5:39 pm
NIC
Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Posts: 141
Location: Brooklyn NY
oh man! your almost at that stage when you realize you are worth SOOOOOO
much more
Girl, when you get there and trust me you will..... fill us in because it's such a joyous occassion that it needs to be shared
We all been there trust me you doin just fine.....
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