Joined: 04 Aug 2004
Posts: 18
Location: United States
Stuck?
I can't seem to make a decision, stay or go? I stay home because of a diability, I contibute money each month, plus take care of the house. My gf works, she doesn't make alot, but the bills get paid. Her money is direct deposited, I have little say in finances. We do not have any joint accounts. I have lived with her almost a year, and we have the same arguments, with no resolutions. If you walked into our home you would not know I live here, I have very little person affects around. But that really isn't the problem, its the lack of emotional closeness. I have turned myself inside out, am I too needy, I am too selfish, am I expecting too much? My son is moving and has asked me to live with him, he is willing to move into a larger apartment or house. I am struggling with this, a part of me wants to go, yet I don't. My gf had told me she didn't share well, I thought that would change once she trusted me and being in love. In the year and a half I have been with her, I have never driven her car, she doesn't trust me with her money, and there are few changes in the house. I do love her, sometimes I get a glimpse of her sensitive side, but then there are times when I feel like a roomate. _________________ live,love and laugh often!
Thu Aug 25, 2005 12:52 pm
Loversheart2
Joined: 21 Jul 2005
Posts: 147
I understand
Hey dear friend I hear you and totally understand please read your pm's. Lets talk soon I have missed chatting with you. Thinking of you.... Here for you.... _________________ Loversheart2
Thu Aug 25, 2005 8:59 pm
Renee
Joined: 05 Jul 2005
Posts: 88
Lainy?
If you feel comfortable living with your son, do it. A year and a half, and your girlfriend hasn't let you drive her car? That's "effed" up. Disability or no, you can do better than this. Please feel free to P.M. me. You deserve way better.
Renee
Fri Aug 26, 2005 3:03 am
mspachy
Joined: 17 Jun 2005
Posts: 18
Location: Chicago, Illinois
Perhaps making a move with your son is just what you need. Things shouldn't be the way they are for you after the time you've spent together and if you don't see that things will significantly change then eventually you have to say when. Remember, as one door closes another always opens, keep your eyes open and you'll see it in no time.
-mspachy _________________ Live for today, tomorrow may never come.
Fri Aug 26, 2005 12:51 pm
topaz117
Joined: 12 Sep 2004
Posts: 44
Location: Southeast USA
Lainy,
Love yourself enough to take care of yourself. Your g/f was at least being truthful with you about herself and her personality. Sometimes when people are 'honest' about who they are, they feel that it is okay to continue to be selfish and inconsiderate. Your g/f doesn't seem to know how to reach out and meet you halfway, it seems you are just along for the ride.
Take your son's offer if you feel comfortable, and be grateful that you have a caring child who wants to help take care of his mom.
I completley understand. I have yet to speak to you but I hope we can soon. My recent ex and I had a very similar situation. She has moved on but this home that for the longest time I did not completley see as mine, is now a lonley place. She made more money than I did. Most of the belongings here are hers. For the most part we acted as roommates than a married couple. I love her dearly and miss her with all my heart but as you can see our relationship was not far from yours. Please do not hesitate to let me know if there is anything I can do for you.
your newest friend,
MH _________________ From this life to the next
I will love you
Sun Aug 28, 2005 7:49 pm
NIC
Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Posts: 141
Location: Brooklyn NY
Don't hate me for this......... ah fuck it hate me!
1- WHY ON EARTH ARE YA'LL ALREADY LIVING TOGETHER IT'S ONLY A YEAR AND A HALF MAN!
that right there could be part of the problem!
2- If ANYONE expected me to live "UNDER THEIR WING" with no sense of self or my personal style or contributing into the ambiance of our home I'd be out!
3- And a very important pointer for you!
THE MINUTE YOU LOOSE YOURSELF IN A REALTIONSHIP IS THE MINUTE THAT REALTIONSHIP ENDS............This I promiseYou! _________________
"For those who understand you,No explanation is necessary, for those who don't,none is possible."
Wed Aug 31, 2005 5:23 pm
NIC
Joined: 15 Aug 2005
Posts: 141
Location: Brooklyn NY
[quote="topaz117"]Lainy,
Your g/f was at least being truthful with you about herself and her personality. Sometimes when people are 'honest' about who they are, they feel that it is okay to continue to be selfish and inconsiderate.
Topaz I gotta disagree with this one !
Sorry babe But if me lady wants to ignore the facts that I personally laid out on the table then it aint my problem!
Making someone well aware of what their getting into is not the problem!
The problem occurs when that person tries to change ya knowing well enough what your about!
Am I alone in this thought or what? _________________
"For those who understand you,No explanation is necessary, for those who don't,none is possible."
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