Well let me first start off by saying that I am happily in a relationship with a wonderful woman for about a year and a half now. Things really are going good...so why am I feeling the need to post in here?
Well, I am 20 years old and I moved from MI to FL to be with my gf who is 25 and a nurse. She is amazing really.
This is my first serious relationship and I came out to my family and friends after she and I became serious, which went very well by the way. I am very close to my family, my parents especially, and we are actually planning a weeks vacation to visit them in less then 3 weeks now. Sounds good right?
Well, I guess I am just feeling a bit overwhlemed really. I know I am in love with my gf and we want to spend the rest of our lives together. I really can't fathom it to be any other way. But something is eating away at me, I feel guilt. I feel like I am putting my family through a lot by asking them to except my life style, along with myself.
I do tell ppl that I am involved with another girl and it does not really bother me. Things don't start to weigh on me untill I start thinking about children, and marriage, and just leading every day life as a homosexual couple.
Anyways, that's going to be all for now. I'm sure with time I will start to feel more comfortable talking about this.
Thank you so much for those who read this and respond, I just need some different view points right now.
Mon May 21, 2007 6:06 pm
wanderinglost
Joined: 26 Feb 2007
Posts: 268
Bella,
In this day and age of quick relationships, doubt is normal (and probably healthy). It seems that very few relationships, straight or gay, seem to last. Just roll with the flow in your relationship and discuss any doubts or discomfort you might have with your gf. She will probably be your greatest source of strength and comfort. You don't have to rush in to major life commitments like children or buying property. Just find a pace that's comfortable for both of you. Best wishes.
wanderinglost
Mon May 21, 2007 9:52 pm
BellaGirl
Joined: 21 May 2007
Posts: 4
Thanks for you advice wanderinglost. My gf and I already live together in a house with two other girls, who are dating eachother as well. It's not that I don't want to spend the rest of my life with her or have kids, because i do and we have talked about this several times.
I just...I don't know....i don't know really. i am happy, very happy, healthy, good family, good friends, amazing girlfriend, yet there is doubt?
crazy huh? Admitting to myself that i am a lesbian is something i struggle with....i know.....crazy.
Tue May 22, 2007 1:17 am
lepus
Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 7
Just enjoy the time you have together NOW and stop thinking about forever and the future. We can get so caught up in "forever" we forget to tend to our relationships in the present.
And then we wonder why they end.
Nothing is guaranteed. Our relationships lasting forever is certainly not guaranteed. Just try to enjoy the time you have with them now and be really present for the person.
Also, you aren't putting your family "through" anything. You're living your life. They choose the pain they assign to your "lifestyle". You need to live you life the way that feels the best to you.
You are young. As you grow older and more confident in your sexuality this issues will pass.
Good luck to you and congrats on finding someone to care for!
Sat Jun 02, 2007 2:01 am
ComereDear
Joined: 10 Jun 2007
Posts: 6
quote:Originally posted by BellaGirl:
Thanks for you advice wanderinglost. My gf and I already live together in a house with two other girls, who are dating eachother as well. It's not that I don't want to spend the rest of my life with her or have kids, because i do and we have talked about this several times.
I just...I don't know....i don't know really. i am happy, very happy, healthy, good family, good friends, amazing girlfriend, yet there is doubt?
crazy huh? Admitting to myself that i am a lesbian is something i struggle with....i know.....crazy.
What's wrong with not labeling yourself? Why don't you just love who you love, and if you don't love them enough, spare them? _________________ The most important thing in life is keeping your word. THAT's integrity.
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