I suppose this could also fit in the "coming out" forum category, but oh well. This is more of me just complaining than me trying to find advice.
And I have two things to "moan and groan" about.
#1)
So, I've been trying to find the courage to tell my mother and father that I am a lesbian. I told them once that I was bisexual, and my mother has sinc told me that she doesn't think I am; she thinks I am completely heterosexual.
Last night, on the way home from a shopping trip, I decided "I'm telling Mom when I get home. Tonight is the night. I have to."
I get home, and I tell her "I have to tell you something, but I'm not sure I can." Because of course I was determined to tell her on the way home, but when I finally get there, I'm hesitant. Figures.
But anyway, I kinda stall a little, and she's teasing me: "Common, out with it! What's up?"
After a few minutes, she asks "Wait a minute, let me guess! You're gay!"
The thing is...she's completely kidding when she asks this, and of course my initial reaction is to laugh histerically. So I laugh it off and tell her I will tell her tomorrow.
...how crappy is that!?!?
....maybe she wasn't kidding when she asked me that? She seemed to be.
#2)
I have a crush on a straight girl. At least she says she's straight, and yet she never has a boyfriend. And I'm deffinitely not out at school (I'm a senior...I'm only 18...I know, I'm young), so even if she were a lesbian it would be hard to hook up.
My social life is kinda sucking.
Mon Sep 04, 2006 8:48 pm
shelfy
Joined: 27 Jun 2005
Posts: 55
Location: michigan
Run,
Would it be a possibility to try and be friends with this "straight" girl from school? At least then you might be able to figure her out. Who knows, maybe this girl may be curious about you as well and just doesn't want to reveal that she likes women, since the two of you are still in school.
I can't imagine what the pressures must be like for you. High school is rough and kids can be cruel if they don't understand....as well as alot of adults. But I can understand why you wouldn't want to come out in school. So, I really hope there is a way you can become friends with this girl. Maybe study together, go out to the movies, hang out at school events, or try to find out her schedule and "accidently" run into her from time to time to get her attention.
As for your parents....you have already told them you are bisexual. Your mom thinks your heterosexual, but yet she joked with you saying your gay. I think your mom knows in her heart that your gay, why else would she put it out there? Seems to be that your parents are good with you being bi/gay, at least thats what I got from your post. But I wish you well in clueing them in a bit more. _________________ just because you can't find me, doesn't mean i'm lost
Tue Sep 05, 2006 5:48 am
RunningGirl
Joined: 17 Aug 2006
Posts: 37
Location: Texas
Thank you for understanding, it means a great deal. It's a pain trying to keep quiet about my sexuality at school, but in the end I think it's for my own good to wait. I have a few friends who've openly said they didn't think being a lesbian was "okay," and I am not quite ready to part with them. Hopefully they'd accept me anyway.
The girl is actually in a few of my classes, and we chat a little bit here and there. I've kinda been avoiding her a little bit (like if I see her looking towards my direction, I make sure my head is pretty much focused on my desk, and if I happen to walk by her in class I look straight ahead). Maybe I shouldn't so much. I'm kinda shy in those kind of situations .
As for my mother...I hope she knows. I almost wish she would just seriously ask me, with a straight face "Are you gay?"
Wed Sep 06, 2006 1:27 am
Shamrock
Joined: 16 May 2005
Posts: 31
Hi Running Girl,
I laughed out loud when I read the whole, "let me guess your gay" remark from your mom. That's actually how I ended up telling my mom I was gay. I had just come out to my sister the week before and she was in the room with us when I was preparing to tell my mom (she was my moral support). Anyway I was visably worked up and mom had had a couple drinks, so she blurts out, "what?! are you gay!?". I just stopped and didn't say anything for awhile and then said "yes". Probably not extremely tactful on my part. I ended up leaving the house for the rest of the night and when I got home the bottle of wine she had been drinking was empty and there was an empty slat and vinager chip bag next to it. Considering she was on weight watchers at the time, my first thought was, "she's really fallen off the wagon now".
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