Joined: 20 Oct 2006
Posts: 391
Location: california
Caddy Shaft
So in my sober old age, I'm beginning to realize I absolutely love men. Yes, this big ole lesbian loves men. Don't panic girls, I don't want to sleep with them. I have rekindled friendships of late and realize I have alot in common with them. Sports, gaming--Women. We have alot to discuss; however, I've also come to realize wherever they go, they always take along their penis.
It's like an American Express card. They,never" leave home without it" They take it to work, to lunch, to church, to the golf course--Everywhere. Although some of my married friends say they occasionally forget to bring it to the bedroom, buts that's a whole other blog.
Anyway, their penis seems to be taken into consideration in everything they do. At least that's what I think happened Thursday afternoon on the golf course. 2:00p.m.,90 degrees, 6 holes left and my friend Slim (female) and myself are waiting for an all male foursome in front of us to clear the green so we can hit.
We are courteous golfers. Earlier we let a father and son "play through", because we were slower, because we could not hit as far. Now we wait hole after hole, as this penis laden foursome in front of us slowly plays on. They clearly see us waiting , sitting in our cart, but they refuse to waive us through because we are women and there is no way we could out drive them. My 200 yard drive rolls up to their feet, a little reminder of our presence. They still played on, Penis, I mean golf club in hand.
So we penisless ones waited. Then it happened. Slim was about to hit from the fairway, I was in the cart, when a beautiful auburn squirrel ran up to my side of the cart. I saw it out of the corner of my eye. Slim saw it too. It started to climb into the cart with me so I quickly exited out the driver's side.
Slim said, "What is that? A dog?" I said "No it's a squirrel and it's after me." I ran behind Slim,because she had a 5 iron in her hand. "Where is it? Under the cart?" Just then the little rodent ran right toward us and stopped about 2 feet away. We stepped back and it moved toward us. We squealed like little penis free girls and moved further away, but the beast ran directly at us again. Every time we moved away, it moved closer.
Slim said, "I think it's hungry. It must think you have food in your cup." The cup I held was filled with icewater. She said, "Quick throw it some ice." I reached in my cup and tossed a handful of ice as far as I could. She was right. Slim is always right. It ran after the ice.
Slim then started to align herself for her shot, but before she could , the beast came barreling toward us obviosly not satisfied with the ice.(Slim was wrong) I threw some more ice and it looked at me as if I was an idiot, as I was cowered behind my 110 lb friend.
Then the damn thing ran right up to Slims' ball and got on top of it. Slim said, "That's it Rock. We've got to take charge of this situation." (Slim knows best) With that she lifted her club high in the air, let out a scream and ran directly toward that little demon, I bravely followed. The squirrel ran for a few feet then suddenly stopped , turned toward us and stood straight up on it's hind feet.We were frozen in place
That's when it happened. Right there before our eyes. In the middle of the 16th fairway. He could not stand it any longer. The damn thing proudly showed us his penis. Not just his penis, but his balls too. Damn! That little squirrel was packin'.
So why write this little story. What lesson was learned. I don't know. But I think Monday morning before I go to work I'll dig through my panty drawer and bring something to work with me that I've never used outside of the privacy of my own home. Something that may give me that certain edge my male counterparts always seem to have. Oh wait. Now that I think about it-- that means I'll have to buy a bigger purse. What the hell, Let's go shopping.
(I am new to the site and didn't know quite where to post this. I would greatly appreciate any responses regarding my posts. Thanks--rachelle)
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Thu Oct 26, 2006 2:12 am
ghost
Joined: 06 Nov 2005
Posts: 2828
Location: MIA
LMAO!! great story, rachelle. please share some more with us, and welcome to mels!
oh, as for where to post, anywhere you think will suit the general mood of your story. this particular one could actually go on the gen boards as well.
grin. come to think of it, why dont we have a humorous story section?? hmmm...
thanks for the laugh.
regards
ghost _________________
MIA
Thu Oct 26, 2006 8:13 pm
ty_26
Joined: 28 Aug 2006
Posts: 3
Location: CA
LOL!!!
I have had a bad day at work and I think you just made me smile for the first time today.
Thanks for sharing.
Thu Oct 26, 2006 11:02 pm
rachelle
Joined: 20 Oct 2006
Posts: 391
Location: california
Thank you both for taking the time to respond. i love this site. a humor section would be great! rachelle
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