lesbian poetry, lesbian poems, lesbian poem, lesbian, poetry, poems, poem, humour, humor, humorous, lesbian humour, lesbian humor, 
humorous poetry,  humorous poems, humorous poem, humorous lesbian poetry, humorous lesbian poems, humorous lesbian poem, poem submissions,
poetry submissions, poetry submission, lesbian poetry submission, lesbian poem submission, submit poetry, submit poem, submit poems, 
submit lesbian poems, submit lesbian poem, submit lesbian poetry, submit poetry, submit poems, submit poem lesbian poetry, lesbian poems, lesbian poem, lesbian, poetry, poems, poem, humour, humor, humorous, lesbian humour, lesbian humor, 
humorous poetry,  humorous poems, humorous poem, humorous lesbian poetry, humorous lesbian poems, humorous lesbian poem, poem submissions,
poetry submissions, poetry submission, lesbian poetry submission, lesbian poem submission, submit poetry, submit poem, submit poems, 
submit lesbian poems, submit lesbian poem, submit lesbian poetry, submit poetry, submit poems, submit poem lesbian poetry, lesbian poems, lesbian poem, lesbian, poetry, poems, poem, humour, humor, humorous, lesbian humour, lesbian humor, 
humorous poetry,  humorous poems, humorous poem, humorous lesbian poetry, humorous lesbian poems, humorous lesbian poem, poem submissions,
poetry submissions, poetry submission, lesbian poetry submission, lesbian poem submission, submit poetry, submit poem, submit poems, 
submit lesbian poems, submit lesbian poem, submit lesbian poetry, submit poetry, submit poems, submit poem lesbian poetry, lesbian poems, lesbian poem, lesbian, poetry, poems, poem, humour, humor, humorous, lesbian humour, lesbian humor, 
humorous poetry,  humorous poems, humorous poem, humorous lesbian poetry, humorous lesbian poems, humorous lesbian poem, poem submissions,
poetry submissions, poetry submission, lesbian poetry submission, lesbian poem submission, submit poetry, submit poem, submit poems, 
submit lesbian poems, submit lesbian poem, submit lesbian poetry, submit poetry, submit poems, submit poem
BACK TO HOME PAGE SITE NAVIGATION CONTACT STORY FORUM GENERAL FORUM   Horoscope  Radio  Gallery  FAQ   Search   Memberlist   Usergroups   Register   Profile   PM's   
Log in 

Poetry Forum Index -> Humorous Poetry

WHO COULD HAVE IMAGINED

LifeVita6
  Author    Thread Post new topic Reply to topic
MdmPrez



Joined: 16 Oct 2007
Posts: 803
Location: US of A
WHO COULD HAVE IMAGINED

I slipped out of my office today
Had a craving for something sweet
Got my sugar free Tastykakes
And my assistant I thought I'd treat

Ice cream was on sale, you see
She could eat it day and night
I opened up the freezer door
Rocky Road seemed just right

I saw out of the corner of my eye
A woman in a motorized chair
She was looking at me in the freezer
I also got gelato with pear

I asked if I could reach her something
She said "no thanks, it's fine"
Next thing I know I'm on the ground
Still holding the ice cream that's mine

She hit me with her skooter
It knocked her out of the chair
We're both rolling on the floor
I'm worried about dirt in my hair

People came from all around
The cart hit me on my side
And while I was on the floor
It ran over my legs, I cried

My nose was bleeding, I hit my face
The manager came running over
Said not to move, he called for help
EMT's with stretchers did hover

Insisted we go to the Emergency Room
So off we went, sirens blaring
Doc at the hospital said I'd be OK
But my slacks would need repairing

I called Mel while leaving the ER
She laughed hysterically
I'm holding ice on my nose
She thinks she's going to wee.

Don't know the point I'm trying to make
Or what the moral of this story might be
But while shopping in the grocery store
Beware of skooters and remember me

Post Thu Feb 05, 2009 1:08 am 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
MysteryGirl
Moderators


Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder


Very Happy Very Happy Oh God Cat, I don;t know whether to laugh or cry! I hope you aren't too black and blue hon but the telling of it is just hysterical.





HugZ, Noni
_________________
Be yourself.............everybody else is taken!

Post Thu Feb 05, 2009 2:58 am 
 View user's profile Send private message Yahoo Messenger  Reply with quote  
MdmPrez



Joined: 16 Oct 2007
Posts: 803
Location: US of A
Noni

Thanks for reading. The weird thing is it seemed to be happening in slow motion - crazy.

Cat

Post Thu Feb 05, 2009 2:04 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
wishonastar



Joined: 23 Jan 2007
Posts: 967
Location: Where I belong


LMAO, all for the sugar free Tastycakes!! next time your out how about picking me up some?? i miss them!!
Glad you are all right if a little bruised. hope you got her name to send her a bill for you slacks!!
))))))))))))))))))))Mdm((((((((((((((((((((((((

Star
_________________
I'm not ready to let go
Cause then I'd never know
What I could be missing
But I’m missing way too much
So when do I give up, what I’ve been wishing for.

Down - Jason Woods

Post Thu Feb 05, 2009 9:29 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
melons
Site Admin


Joined: 06 Feb 2004
Posts: 2371
(((((((((((((My Darling Cat)))))))))))))

*Chuckling.......

BRAVO!!!!

OMG (*laughing really hard and almost falling off my chair), I remember when you called to tell me you'd had an accident lol.....you made it sound sooooooooooooo funny and I really did nearly 'pee my panties!' ( remember the scene from Pretty Woman lol) !!

There I was, sitting at my desk at work and you came straight out with 'I was by the ice cream freezer and got run over by a woman on a motorized chair!' Smile

DO you realise that until you gave me more details, my first 'vision' was of you, head down in a large chest freezer full of ice cream tubs,......your legs sticking out the top and wriggling like crazy lol....and of course, spreadeagled *watching you through sultry, dark eyes...).

I seem to remember you trying to tease me and telling me you had a skirt on too (*smiling and pulling you into my arms). I imagined your skirt up around your waist (in fact, I'm sure you said it had risen up and your legs were spreadeagled lol) and your crotchless panties were on show *chuckling.....or maybe I imagined that bit and it was wishful images on my part *chuckling.

Anyway, I really am glad you were ok baby and....you told the story superbly here Smile

Don't you just love writing humorus anecdotes of things that happen to you Smile ...I love it....laughter is the spice of life Smile.

You amaze me baby, thrill me frequently......love me even more and .....spin my world.

I love you and your poem.

Your Mel xoxoxox


P.S. You just HAVE to write that other humerous one now!! lol.

Post Thu Feb 05, 2009 10:31 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
Angel1
Moderators


Joined: 09 Mar 2007
Posts: 1518
Location: U.K


(((((((((Cat))))))))))))
OMG.... i hate to admit this Embarassed but i am sitting here laughing uncontrollably Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Laughing Embarassed
Those scooters are a health hazard, many a time when i have been in town i have had to dodge them Rolling Eyes
Hope that there were no broken bones.Do take good care whilst out shopping in future Wink

Lol@ (((((((((((((Mel)))))))))))))) Laughing
with lots of love and respect
Angel x Exclamation

_________________
"We are not human beings having a spiritual experience.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience."
-Pierre Teilhard de Chardin (1881-1955)

Post Sat Feb 07, 2009 11:59 am 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
Xalia1
Moderators


Joined: 05 May 2004
Posts: 3702
Location: In love


HAHAHAH!!!!
OMG Mdm, that was a hilarious poem!
I'm sorry you got hurt...you're ok?
But you put such a funny edge on this, I laughed till I cried picturing this...
You rock hellas, as always.

*gives you a nice soft pillow for your head and an asprin*

Hugs,
Xalia
_________________
Nobody said life would be easy...They just promised it would be worth it.
~♥♥~
~The words fail me.. because what I feel for you is beyond description...~

Post Sat Feb 07, 2009 6:52 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message Send e-mail Yahoo Messenger  Reply with quote  
Tracey



Joined: 30 Dec 2005
Posts: 1489
Location: Ayr, Scotland


OMG!!! i hope you are feeling better now
those scooters are pretty dangerous

oh! did you get your ice-cream in the end??? Wink


*hugs*

Traceyx
_________________
I know I'm in my own little world, but it's ok. They know me here.

sometimes i wonder... ' why is that frisbee getting bigger'... and then it hits me

Post Mon Feb 09, 2009 2:51 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
ae



Joined: 17 Sep 2006
Posts: 1025
Location: that tragic backwater, the gulf coast of florida


Good grief! I've heard of aggressive shoppers, but that is out of hand!

Hope you are sufficiently on the mend!

Exclamation
ae
_________________
-
-
-
"...a soul that wakes up to find itself wandering, unwanted, between the spheres."

Post Fri Feb 13, 2009 6:53 pm 
 View user's profile Send private message  Reply with quote  
  Display posts from previous:      
Post new topic Reply to topic

Jump to:  


Last Thread | Next Thread  >

Forum Rules:
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
LifeVita3

 

 



Search For Posters!


Powered by phpBB © 2001, 2005 phpBB Group

In Association with Amazon.com
     
Terms & Conditions Privacy Statement Acknowledgements