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Finally........a beginning
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MysteryGirl
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Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder


And the saga continues. Yesterday I spoke to my elder sister but unfortunately that didnt go down very well,partly because of family dynamics on other subjects. I felt hurt when her only comment that directly addressed my 'coming out' was that it was my choice and I would have to live with it. I didnt feel strong enough to enter into a discussion about whether it was a choice or not Sad As my other son and my other sisters are travelling I think that is where I will leave this process for the time being.

Again I appreciate all the support I have received here at Mels, now and in the past.


MG
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Post Fri May 20, 2011 11:51 pm 
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Outdoors65



Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Posts: 282
Location: Anywhere Outside


MG,
So sorry I missed the middle report about you coming out to your middle son and his fiance. I am so glad that went well for you!!!!

As far as the convo with your sister, only you know best, but here is my .02 worth. It may be an issue of education rather than judgment. For so many years, society has been "trained" to believe our sexual orientation is a choice rather than something else. (I even think there are Mel's members who are on both sides of this discussion.)

Last year I worked with a woman who was in a committed relationship with another woman, but they had not been living near her parents. That changed when she got a job near her home town. In coming out to one of her family members, she posed the question to her sister, "when did you DECIDE you were a heterosexual?" Without responding to the question, the sister said, "I get it."

I don't know if this helps at all, but it was on my mind/heart to share with you. Again...WTG on the progress of coming out to the family members thus far, and thanks for sharing with all of us!

Blessings to you,
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Outdoors


Last edited by Outdoors65 on Sat May 21, 2011 11:32 pm; edited 1 time in total

Post Sat May 21, 2011 12:21 am 
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wys2uways



Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 272


Oh my gosh...

I love the comment "when did you DECIDE you're heterosexual?"

Very Happy

Post Sat May 21, 2011 1:32 am 
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Outdoors65



Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Posts: 282
Location: Anywhere Outside


Thanks Wys,

I have pondered this topic off and on over the course of several road trips. Car times make for good thinking/processing.
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Post Sat May 21, 2011 11:34 pm 
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MysteryGirl
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Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder


Update - process completed. Spoke to my youngest son who has been out of computer communication and his reply was that it was cool with him and if I was happy, then he was happy Very Happy

Email communications with my younger sister garnered the reply "Der, well I already knew that, I couldn't care if you were pink with purple spots, it's your private life". I've not had any reply from my much older, upright Christian sister and suspect she is choosing her words. I dont care. It's DONE. I'm out to my family and now I can simple stop thinking about it.



HugZ, MG
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Post Mon Jun 27, 2011 11:55 am 
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Tracey



Joined: 30 Dec 2005
Posts: 1489
Location: Ayr, Scotland


((((((((Noni)))))))))

that is great news and a giant leap for you
really proud of you as i know how hard it is to do


*hugs*


Tracey x
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Post Mon Jun 27, 2011 2:35 pm 
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aidyl



Joined: 11 Nov 2007
Posts: 173
Location: Trinidad


Good. Mental peace now that the weight of family now knowing is off your shoulder.

Post Mon Jun 27, 2011 9:33 pm 
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Outdoors65



Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Posts: 282
Location: Anywhere Outside


EXCELLENT News, NONI!!!!!!!

Thanks for sharing the updates with all of us! ...and so happy for you regarding the responses from your youngest son and your other sister! Enjoy being YOU!!!!!!!

Blessings,
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Outdoors

Post Tue Jun 28, 2011 2:58 am 
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PipSqueak



Joined: 04 Jul 2008
Posts: 987
Location: S.W. England


(((((((((((((((((MG))))))))))))))))))))))))))
That is amazing! I'm so glad to hear your news. I'm sorry to hear about your sisters' responses but maybe things will change....
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Post Mon Jul 25, 2011 10:13 pm 
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MysteryGirl
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Joined: 02 Jun 2007
Posts: 3419
Location: I come from a land downunder


Update.....just cause I felt like it LOL

My children has got on with their lives as if their Mum being gay is of no more concern to them than yesterday's news. In general nothing earth
hattering has happened in the past few months but it is the little things that have been nice. Not having to hide books or DVD's that I buy, being able to point my future daughter in law towards the stories I write on Smashwords without worry about the contents and being able to 'friend' many of my nieces and nephews on FB.

My eldest sister sent me a curt reply to my initial coming out email which on the surface looked reasonably fair however if you understand her method of communications and read between the lines, it was pretty terse. Since then she has not communicated with me in any way at all, phone, text or email. But you know what, it is her problem, not mine. I am attempting to rebuild a relationship with my other
elder sister and although there has been no mention of my admission, at least we are getting along in other ways.

I am out now to people I come across in my everyday life, my Dr, my hairdresser, my neighbours and I am so glad to no longer be hiding.
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Post Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:11 am 
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Eilidh
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Joined: 09 Apr 2005
Posts: 1880


(((((((((((((((((((((MG))))))))))))))))))))))))
That's great to hear. Good for you!

Hugs,
Eilidh

Post Thu Sep 08, 2011 10:17 pm 
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aidyl



Joined: 11 Nov 2007
Posts: 173
Location: Trinidad


Good for you MG Smile Exclamation The walking on egg shells, the always having to be careful of what one says, and the always having to hide stuff, the wearing of two faces (the public one and the private one) can be so emotionally and mentally draining. I feel happy for you as if i knew you personally. I am glad that your children love you unconditionally. As for your sisters ...take it as it comes. Love them, treat them with respect, and always be there for them regardless of how they maybe towards you.

Post Fri Sep 09, 2011 12:23 pm 
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naturelover



Joined: 19 Sep 2009
Posts: 70
Location: East Coast US


Wow. How did I miss this? Congrats and thanks for sharing the good news. I can only imagine the relief and happiness that follows....
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Post Wed Sep 14, 2011 12:27 am 
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