Joined: 24 Oct 2007
Posts: 1
Location: Fayetteville, AR
untitled...
Hello..i'm new....i write poetry....but only through experience...i try to write other times but usually it doesnt work lol....so will you tell me what you think??????
Separate from the crowd
Oblivious to those around
They don’t see everyone stare
Nor do they care
They move in for a kiss
When suddenly reality sets in
And someone yells
You’re going to Hell
They move apart
Then notice the stares
Those of Hatred and disgust
But they leave with
they’re heads held high
Because they have something
No one else has
Each other.
I hold you in the darkness
where everything feels so right
But when the night ends
and day begins
I know that we must keep a distance
That neither of us must not have
a slip of the tongue
And say girlfriend instead "Roommate"
For if we out ourselves
We could be fired
Ridiculed
or worse
I feel sad sometimes
That I can't tell the world
That you are mine
So I wait
I wait for the darkness
and hold you in my arms again.
Wed Oct 24, 2007 1:48 am
Cavewoman
Joined: 06 Sep 2005
Posts: 2056
Location: nearby
I think your writing is fine..........
BUT...
and please pardon my abruptness, its just me...
look up... see the captial P in a circle?
click it... it will take you to the poetry section... many categories to choose from..... that is where you "should" post your writings...
meanwhile, Hello! _________________ " The sorcerers in life are created within each of us" --- Lynn V. Andrews
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