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Don't really know if this is a good thing or not.

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Dykeofhazzard



Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 46
Location: Denham Springs, Louisiana
Don't really know if this is a good thing or not.

So My mom has just started talking to me again after three years since I came out of the closet and she sent me this.



I've been doing some scrapbooking while I'm here with your dad in Atlanta. When I came to the pictures I took when we all took Nana to the Aquarium of the Americas, I almost cried. You were so beautiful and I miss you so much, my beloved daughter.

I wish I knew why you have deserted your family and your God, but I cling to His promise that He makes all things new.

I love you forever. Mom



And than I sent her this back




Mom, I have sat here and read posts and cell phone texts such as these for nearly three years now. I try to stay away from this subject with you so not to hurt you anymore than I'm sure you already are hurting. I have held my tongue no matter how much it stung to read you saying I have deserted you and God.

I respect you and dads wishes in me not interacting with you or any of my siblings, But I need you to know that I have not deserted you or dad or any of my family or my God. I have NEVER said no to any chance I get to see ANY of my family however that chance is few and far between. I was asked by you and dad to leave, while again I respected your choice to put me out I did not like it and it hurt me greatly and to be quite honest I FELT DESERTED.

I know this hurts you to read but I need to say it.

This was never a choice for me, Do you honestly think I would choose a live where I am a minority that doesn't have the right to merry the person I love? Who is ridiculed and teased and persecuted for who I love? If it was I would have CHOSEN Mikie, he was an amazing guy, I truly truly believe he is one of the kindest and most attractive guys out there. But no matter how much I tried, that's all he was...a great guy...a great friend.
This is who I am. I love Jennie with a good pure love. we make three years on may 15th.

But this has never and will never replace the love I have for you, or dad or any of my brothers and sisters. I am still the same person you loved three years ago, the girl that was your best friend, and not ashamed of it, the girl that took on going up the down escalators with you, and wanted nothing more than to just be with you.

I have to go through life every day knowing that my parents are ashamed of who I am.

I found a movie that answered a lot of questions for me it's a documentary called "For the Bible tells me so" it can be found on Amazon or you can watch it in segments on Youtube. I hope and pray that you watch it and might be able to understand what the bible really means when it mentions homosexuality.

I'm Sorry this hurts you so much and no matter what you decide to tell yourself after reading this I DO care about your feeling and I DO care that you feel betrayed and I DO love you just as much as I did three years ago. I AM the same person, I AM a born again daughter of my God Jesus Christ. I AM a lesbian woman, and never will cease to be one. And I WILL be with Jennie until the day I die or until Christ comes again.

I have loved catching up with you on FB and I understand that it has been a leap of faith to do it, I understand that you were risking getting hurt and I know some of the things I have said have indeed hurt you. I understand if this ruins you messaging me. But please understand how much it hurt me to type it, knowing how much it would hurt you, and I couldn't be silent and change the subject or just ignore it anymore.

I pray that you will watch the video I have mentioned. I pray that I am still able to talk to you.And I love you mom, I do.

With all the love I can send through a email

Sarah.


Yeah I don't think Ill be hearing from her anymore.[/b]
_________________
The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon,
but that we wait so long to begin it.

Post Fri Apr 30, 2010 11:14 pm 
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Outdoors65



Joined: 12 Aug 2009
Posts: 282
Location: Anywhere Outside


Sarah,
Thank you so much for sharing the message you sent to your mom. So much of what you wrote parallels my "story." You give me courage to take the next step to communicate with my parents again.

In addition to the DVD you mentioned, I have come across a couple of books that you may find useful for your communication and reconciliation with your parents. "Loyal Opposition" by Tex Sample is a book about how people of the Methodist denomination are loyal to the doctrine, but oppose the double standard that some church leaders have set. "Exile or Embrace" by Mahan Siler is a description of how a pastor faced the question of how he would demonstrate God's love to ALL members of the congregation...or even non-members.

I hope these are helpful for you and your family if you so choose to share them.

Blessings to you...and congratulations on 3 years!
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Outdoors

Post Sat May 01, 2010 2:02 am 
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Dykeofhazzard



Joined: 12 Sep 2006
Posts: 46
Location: Denham Springs, Louisiana


Outdoors ,
Thank you for the kind words and for the resources I will defiantly check them out.

And I hope all goes well with your parents.
_________________
The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon,
but that we wait so long to begin it.

Post Sun May 02, 2010 12:44 am 
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girlwithguitar4447



Joined: 29 Jan 2010
Posts: 124
Location: Michigan


All I can say is I hope your mother is able to see past her struggles to accept this one facet of who you are and remember once more all of the wonderful things about who you are that made you guys such close friends before. I believe you stated the truth very sweetly and with great love and respect for your mother. I hope she hears you out and keeps the lines of communication open.

Post Mon May 03, 2010 8:06 pm 
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